In the Cards: Desert Scorpion
You know what I love most about Desert Scorpion? Is it the amazing weapon complement? The unique uniform design? The cool, Snake Eyes-Esque mask? I appreciate all those great elements, but my favorite part of the figure is Unexplained Giant Scorpion. The accessory list printed next to the card bubble calls it a pet scorpion, but I prefer my name.
The Impel card does nothing to explain the presence of the UGS, and that’s just fine with me. Mystery is sorely missing from nerd culture these days, as every bit of minutiae gets explained and worked into canon. Why do the Desert Scorpions get giant scorpion sidekicks? In the 90s toy makers said who knows–make up your own dang story, kid.
The Impel card set gave us a treasure trove of unique character art, and the lesser known 90s toys certainly deserved more massive media exposure. 1991 is a favorite year of mine, and Cobras like this guy are a fave within a fave. Desert Scorpion looks appropriately badass alongside UGS, which is a pretty mean feat. How does he manage it? He just slides those red goggles up and mean mugs us. Wicked.