Dusty (2004)

Here’s one I probably could have saved for the next nice pants week, but I couldn’t resist. Introducing the ultimate forgotten classic, Desert Patrol Stretcher–I mean Low Light–I mean Dusty.

All I can think of when I see the head on this figure is, the possible title for a SyFy original movie: “When Turtlenecks Attack!” Does anyone have any idea what happened here? Was Dusty the victim of a bizarre shaving accident, or does he just have some sort of farmer’s tan on his face and neck?

If any figure represents the shodiness and inattention to detail that the multi packs had become late in the new sculpt era, it’s this one. Frustratingly confusing in construction and origin, Desert Patrol Dusty stands close to Stars and Stripes Breaker as one of the most alarmingly crappy Joe figures in my collection.

Words fail me, folks. So in lieu of further pain and suffering, I’ll just offer a close-up of the head. A word of advice–look quickly, then move on, like ripping a band aid off a particularly hairy body part.


  • I agree, this figure is every bit as bad as the S-n-S Breaker. Trash it.

  • Hate to waste a “worst figure ever” on this p.o.s. but if the turtleneck fits….

  • And this is where my idea of adjusting the 6-packs would’ve worked the greatest. But, since this is an official release, you can salvage it by turning it into the Desert Patrol Squad version of Low-Light. How? Simple:
    1. Replace the head with that of an extra Vamp w/Twin Battle Gun Big Brawler–since that head is a reuse of the 1991 Low-Light.
    2. Give him his original accessories, which can be found on many a newsculpt figure–his backpack (from the first JvsC Destro), knife (from many a figure in 2002 or ’03), rifle (2002 Neo-Viper), while his helmet/visor and flashlight can be salvaged from damaged figures.

    • I never made the obvious connection that I had Low-lights head on the VAMP/ TBG Brawler, darn, that could have been cool, but how do the skin tones match up?

      Most of the Desert Patrol and Anti-venom sets ended up getting part-swapped around between them since the colors went together fairly decently.

      The once-coined term on the forums was “choco-cam,” I think, and I didn’t care for it very long. Compared to the Tiger Force and Python Packs…., so close, but so far away.

      Except on DP Dusty…, so far away it isn’t funny.

  • Steven B. Williams

    Turtleneck? Looks more like a neck brace. The cap and microphone piece looks cool, but I don’t know how that would fit into a desert trooper’s role. The torso looks like Dusty jumped an Eel (v.2), took the top part of his wetsuit, colored it green, ripped off the fins, and wore it. The pants looks like the cheesy top of some lasagna sprinkled with pepper.

  • Yeah, this guy was part of what stopped me from buying the Desert Patrol Squad. I really liked a couple of the figures in it (like the Stalker and the Snake Eyes since it was the first time I’d seen that particular mold since my brother got him in 1991) but with guys like Dusty and camo-bellbottoms Tunnel Rat in the set I really couldn’t justify dropping the money on that set…

    • Snake Eyes was the only figure to survive from that pack, the upper half is part of my default Snake Eyes here. (I put “night fighter” Guile pants on him)

      A new Stalker was just what I wanted at that time, but the bulk of the Duke mold that was used, with its outward-bending elbows and strange silver ring that was a sleeve detail just killed it. Plus the painted eyes on what I got were very wacky looking. Such potential on this Stalker that never came to be!

  • Considering the hat and boot combo with the quilted sweater, his code name could be Showjumper, the former Olympic equestrian turned Joe Cavalryman. Would get another critter into the cannon to join Timber, Polly et al.

  • Seems like every multi-pack had a “just use that mold” figure in it, and this is one of them. I can’t believe they couldn’t get their hands on even the ’91 Dusty mold. Even Anti-Venom Sgt. Lifeline (ugh) has some parts useful for customs. This Dusty is garbage.

  • I hate it when they created “boots” by painting everything below the knee one color. Sucked on on the Lampreys, and it sucked here.

    All the other bases have been covered, neckbrace, strange kit-bash, but let’s mention he’s the second “white faced” use of Stretcher’s mold. Once wasn’t that bad, but would it have killed them to find a better head or even release Stretcher’s mold as Stretcher.

    The camo also blew, it just didn’t translate into 3 3/4″ well.

  • Wow. That is hooooorible.

  • Pingback: Joe A Day » Snake Eyes (2004)

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